A night in the life of a Safewalker

My partner and I walk in sync, glowing neon yellow in the dark, as our breath forms smoky clouds in the cold. We wait and watch for movement until finally, we see someone leave the safety of a well-lit building. Their hood is up, and they're fumbling with their gloves. Now's our chance! We close in. “Hi there! Would you like a Safewalk?”“Oh, uh, no thank you.” “That’s okay, have a good n… yeah they’re gone.” Repeat that a few dozen times, with the occasional acceptance thrown in, and that’s pretty much the life of a Safewalker.My Thursday night shift starts at 12:15 a.m.,  so I get to Safewalk headquarters at exactly 12:14, giving myself just enough time to grab a handful of whatever snack the supervisor has provided. I shuffle through the rack of vests, looking for one that's at least semi-new with unbroken straps. My partner and I do a walkie-talkie check before we roll out, ready for anything (like, I don’t know, Safewalking). Then we walk along the shuttle routes, keeping our eyes peeled for any lonely singles (yeah, I’m aware of how that sounds). Unfortunately, when you're working the last shift on a weeknight, as I do, two clients is considered a busy night. During the time in between—which can be up to an hour—my partner and I talk and walk. The conversation always begins with basic pleasantries (how our midterms are going, which fall movies we’re looking forward to, etc.) but by the time 1:00 a.m. rolls around, we're discussing that one episode of Black Mirror with the pig, or I find myself accidentally saying something like, “Do you think you could kill a man with his bare hands?” instead of “your bare hands." We get back to headquarters at 2:15 a.m. and then my poor ass has to bounce all the way back to New Pembroke. Sunday nights are the same except my partner is a sophomore, so I’m constantly asking her stuff like “Does it get better?" to which she responds, “No, it gets worse”—usual freshman-sophomore banter. Sound boring? It’s not, most of the time. Pretty much anything is entertaining when you’re tired and have an imagination, plus, sometimes weird things happen. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most typical experiences I’ve had as a Safewalker so far (keep in mind, I’ve only been at it half a semester).

• Instead of saying “Requesting a 10-7 at Andrews!” into my walkie-talkie before taking my break during my first-ever shift, I just said, “I’m taking a break,” and immediately knew I'd fucked up.
• The only time we ever took a break at Jo’s, someone dropped their cup of mozzarella sauce and it splattered onto my partner’s coat. Instead of apologizing, the stranger simply walked away, and my partner turned to me and said, “Imagine caring that little about human life."
• Every time we pass another Safewalk team we say, "Hey do you want a Safewalk??!!” and pretend like it’s funny.
• I explained to my partner that I can’t go fishing anymore because I once had an epiphany that fishing requires drowning a worm in the process and he had to sit down on the sidewalk because he was laughing so hard.
• I passed a group of freshman playing beer pong outside on the Andrews patio.
• I enlightened my Thursday partner on queer culture terminology for a solid 30 minutes.
• I jumped into a pile of leaves on the Main Green and then walked around the rest of the night with leaves in my boots.
• Random stretching breaks/Taekwondo practice
• Heartbreaking moments where you ask someone if they’d like a Safewalk and then realize they have earbuds in and didn’t hear you, so you pass like two parallel trains in the night, destined to never meet.
• Constantly being afraid of evaluation (when a supervisor follows you to make sure you're not doing dumb stuff like jumping into piles of leaves—Nothando please don’t fire me)
• Feeling like a James Bond badass when using code names for walkie talkie communication.
• I once walked by a car in which two people were having sex.

  I applied to Safewalk for two reasons. One, I loved the concept. Helping fellow students feel more comfortable on our college campus? You can’t get more pure and wholesome than that. The second reason was that it involves getting paid for low-key exercise—I was like, sign me the fuck up. I still feel this way, but I wonder if Safewalk is an underutilized resource. Are people not requesting Safewalks because they already feel safe on campus or because they don’t want to ‘be a burden?’ It’s sometimes scary to ask for help, but it is literally our job to help you, and despite the silliness from earlier, we genuinely respect your safety. So if you ever feel like Safewalk would increase your sense of security even just a little, don’t be afraid to give us a call at (401) 863-1079!P.S. Stay safe this Halloween! Have fun but make good choices! (Like calling Safewalk ;) )Images via.