Up your butt and around the corner: the prostate

DisclaimerThis article deals with topics of biological sex, which is a collection of physiological characteristics associated with the presence or absence of a Y chromosome in a person. Sex deals with reproduction and, of course, sexual activity, and we can describe people's sex with terms like female, intersex, and/or male. Sex is a different and independent thing from gender, which is a socially-constructed identity most people have that can be described with terms like man, woman, non-binary, agender, and a variety of other labels (or none at all). While they are related in our culture, sex and gender are not required to match up in any specific way. Female people can be women or men or neither. The same is true for male people and intersex people. While terms like "men" and "male" are often used interchangeably in modern society, the Blognonian wants to make it clear that we are using sex terms in this article very intentionally as separate and distinct from gender terms. Please keep in mind that a person of any gender can be any sex. Lastly, even if the conventions detailed above dictate that a specific person be labelled as some term, if they say that they do not identify with that term, do not use it to describe them. Better yet, just don't assume anyone's gender or sex unless they tell them to you! They know themselves better than you ever will! Now let's dive in. IntroHey everyone! I'm Cer Vix-A-Lot, and I'm excited to talk about a topic that is very near and dear to my heart: anal penetration. As a cisgender gay man, I'm no stranger to the anus; but it seems as though the pleasures of butthole-stimulation are totally missing from the straight male population. I firmly believe that the reason for this is a lack of information and educated discussion around the topic. So I'm here today to fill you in on everything you need to know about anal penetration, the male reproductive system, and the severely under-hyped male g-spot, the prostate! Crash Course on Male Reproductive System There's a whole lot of stuff happening in the above diagram, but here are the basics on the most important players:Probably the most prominent feature of male anatomy is the penis (um maybe you've heard of it?). In terms of reproduction, its job is just to deliver sperm. In terms of sex, its job is mainly to go in things. To be clear, the penis is made out of spongy tissue that is porous and flexible, meaning it can inflate with blood when aroused. It is not a muscle or bone or something. The penis naturally has a foreskin, which covers the sensitive head , or glans. However, it is common amongst Jewish and Muslim populations (for religious reasons) and in the United States (for historical and cultural reasons largely based in misinformation) for the penis to be circumcised, meaning that the foreskin is surgically removed soon after birth. By the way, circumcision is the most common surgery in the US.Hanging out beneath the penis are the two testes (also known as testicles, balls, nuts, etc). They actually produce the sperm. A lot. The average adult male produces about 120 million sperm every day, which is 1200 sperm per heartbeat. Each sperm takes 64-74 days to develop, 50-60 of which they spend traversing the 700 feet (213.4m) of tubing in each testicle. Sperm spend the last two weeks maturing in the epididymis, that thing sitting on top of the testis. Once they're finished, they'll be waiting in that bend in the tubing near the bottom of the scrotum (which is the sack of muscle and skin that holds the testes).During sex, the sperm from the epididymis travel up the vas deferens and into the prostate gland where the vas deferens merge with the urethra (the tube through the penis that carries urine and semen. The sperm compose 10% of the volume of semen, with 80% of the fluid coming from the seminal vesicles that are attached to the vas deferens. These glands produces a basic fluid meant to counteract the acidity of the vagina/uterus and improve the survivability of the sperm. The remaining 10% of semen comes from the prostate gland itself, and this secretion is mostly composed of simply sugars. During orgasm and ejaculation, semen is forced through the urethra and out of the tip of the penis. What's going on during sex that makes it feel so good?The reason that people with penises typically enjoy putting them in things so much is that the friction of penetration (or any touch, really) stimulates the densely packed nerves at the tip and less densely packed nerves along the shaft. These nerve impulses trigger the pleasure centers in the brain to release endorphins, causing the feeling of sexual pleasure. Any areas where touch or stimulation causes sexual pleasure are called erogenous zones, and they include the penis, clitoris, and other parts of the genitalia, in addition to areas like the nipples, lips, neck, etc. Erogenous zone sensitivity varies between people. For example, a circumcised penis may be less sensitive to stimulation than an uncircumcised penis since the head is exposed to physical contact and friction much more frequently in the former case. What happens when you put something up your butt?Many people are fairly in touch with their erogenous zones and know which areas give them more or less pleasure. However, people with penises who examine the male reproductive system diagram above may notice that the prostate gland is located just behind the inner wall of the rectum. The prostate is a sexual organ and a surprisingly powerful erogenous zone for many people when stimulated. How can you stimulate it? By putting things up your anus, of course.This is no secret to a majority of queer men and/or queer people with prostates, as anal sex is relatively common in these communities. But there's a lot of stigma around anal penetration for straight men, where getting penetrated in any way is seen as "homosexual" or "emasculating." If you're a straight cisgender man and feel uncomfortable with the concept of using your butt in sex, that's totally normal! American culture sends a lot of messages that being penetrated isn't "what a man should do." But speaking from a purely biological perspective, if you have a prostate and stimulate it through anal penetration, there is a very large chance that you will experience a lot of sexual pleasure from it. Just make sure to use lube and start small! Pegging/ Why straight cis men should try thisNow, I'm a queer cisgender man, so you might not feel comfortable trusting my opinion on anal sex. So I interviewed a friend who identifies as a historically heterosexual cisgender man who has recently gotten involved in anal penetration (from here on out, he is abbreviated as SG for Straight Guy):How did you first get interested in anal penetration?SG: It was kinda caused by cultural references, like the movie Road Trip. Also realized that a lot of things I thought were normal or I liked or didn’t like was just what I expected of myself. There could be other stuff that I could try that I might like. So I started fingering myself in the shower and it was awesome.How did your anal stimulation experiences progress from there?SG: I spent a lot of time fingering myself in the shower because it’s, like, safe, warm, steamy. It’s so slippery and there’s lotions and a lot of stuff at your disposal. It wasn’t until this year (junior year) that I moved on to pegging with my partner. I saw a great promotion on a tumblr porn blog for 50% off sex toys, which should give you pause because sex toys shouldn't be that cheap because there might be something wrong with them. But I didn't give it a second thought and it turns out it was a reputable source so I bought a strapless strap-on dildo. That’s a strap-on dildo that, instead of having a strap, has a bulb that can be inserted into a vulva or butthole for holding (you just have to kegel on to it). I also bought some packer gear, which is underwear with a plastic ring embedded in it that holds the strap-on in place. My partner wears it in her vagina and uses it to penetrate me in the ass (note: this is often referred to as pegging). Honestly, it’s way more intense than using my penis for sex. I haven’t cum from it yet, but it’s still so enjoyable that sometimes I’d rather use it for sex than my wiener.What would you recommend for hesitant straight men who are considering involving their anuses in sex?

SG: You don’t need it to be a one or the other thing; while jerking off, you can pop a finger in there. I’d recommend trying it in the shower for your first time, definitely. Lastly, just don’t knock something until you try it. I just want the whole world to finger their buttholes.

 If I put something up my butt and enjoy it, am I gay?This is a great question, and the answer is no, not necessarily! Obviously, questioning your sexuality is totally normal, and if you're unsure about how you identify, I would never recommend shying away from the topic. Human sexuality is fluid and complex, and it's very unlikely that any person is totally heterosexual or homosexual. That being said, if you have a prostate, you will probably enjoy anal stimulation. This is completely independent of your sexual orientation. It's really just a physiological response. If you pinch your skin, it will cause pain. If you stimulate your prostate, it will cause pleasure. I totally acknowledge the stigma surrounding this topic, but don't avoid anal penetration because you're concerned people will think you're gay. For one thing, it shouldn't matter what they think of your sexual orientation because only you can determine your sexuality. For another thing, you might be missing out on some pretty intense orgasms. Just saying. What if I don't have a prostate?There are many people who don't have prostates who enjoy anal penetration and derive a lot of sexual pleasure from it. However, since the prostate isn't there to provide the stimulation, whether penetration is enjoyable seems to be on a much more case-by-case basis. If you don't have a prostate, definitely give it a shot if you feel comfortable with it! But don't be surprised if it's more uncomfortable than pleasurable. Basic TakeawaysEveryone should consider anal penetration, because you might really enjoy it! Start slow, small, and use lubricant if you need. It's ok to be uncomfortable with it as a concept, but make sure to think critically about what exactly is holding you back; there are plenty of legitimate reasons to not want to try anal penetration (and that's totally ok!), but the most common reasons tend to be a lack of understanding and internalized homophobia, especially amongst straight cisgender men. If you're interested in trying anal penetration with a partner, have a real conversation about it first and make sure that everyone is clear on the plan and ready for action. Lastly, and I'm upset that I even have to say this, but if you "surprise" a partner with anal sex without them knowing, being prepared, and giving continuous, enthusiastic consent throughout, that is sexual assault and you are committing a serious violation of another person's bodily autonomy. Alright, world, you heard SG. Time to get out there and finger your buttholes! Images via, via, and via Kelly Carey-Ewend '19